the linked article engaging with 'the fuck list', posted on jezebel which offers 'celebrity, sex, fashion for women' and is a kind of new wave youth feminist blog (kind of), assumes a positive stance about the whole thing. it shows the thing in its entirety, with names and faces blurred. when it first came out, however, the author never intended it to be seen by more than a few friends, and as i mentioned previously, the men's names and faces were there for all to see. evidently this caused alot of strife for the author, as the men she chose to detail were the who's whos of the college lacrosse team, etc. anyway, she had great sex, really bad sex, drunk sex, public sex; all kinds of sex. basically her sex was out there. she was treated like a princess and treated like a sex toy. very controversial, and perhaps hard to take a stance on; particularly from a feminist cyborg point of view. the blog itself offers this tidbit:
"We're not condoning putting any of these sorts of things in writing or within range of the Internet, especially when using the real names of your partners. But you know what? Here's another reminder that women can be as flip, aggressive, or acquisitive about sex as men can. And there's nothing wrong with that, as long as all parties are consenting. (Of course, these guys didn't consent to have their performances publicly evaluated, but there you go. Again, people, do not put it in writing.)"
in a way, this reminds me of jennicam. sex is part of everyday life, and there's no reason not to be able to talk or joke about it- only if it is not harming another. the author deeply regrets the whole ordeal and the embarassment suffered by her 'subjects;' at the same time, she says that frat groups do similar things all the time. i like the idea of a woman seeking and controlling good sex, where the man will not treat her as a piece of meat. and no, i don't think it makes her a slut. i say good on her, i think it's hilarious- although she definately should have thought to blur out the names and faces herself before clicking send.
Interesting article. I don't know what to make of it overall, but two things trouble me.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, she rates the subjects, inter alia, on aggressiveness. At one point, "blindly obeyed" a strangers calls to get into a cab, and blacks out; evidence of how good the sex was included the bruising she discovered in the shower. So I'm struggling to see this as a case of someone "seeking and controlling good sex, where the man will not treat her as a piece of meat."
Secondly--and this I have a stronger opinion about--what kind of academic standards are they being held to at that university? No previous works cited, poor sample selection process, and published in PowerPoint, of all things. What kind of graduate student would not write this up in LaTeX, or Word at the least?
Finally, a question: have we not learned several times over the unwanted consequences of careless e-mailing and forwarding?
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ReplyDeleteaggressiveness in this context means willingness to 'take control' in the bedroom. she's not interested in being roughed up.
ReplyDeleteshe had already graduated, and did this as a joke for her friends- it wasn't actually her thesis.
she was young and often inebriated, and acted as many do. that's not to say that she didn't do silly things. she's not proud of everything she's done, and i'm not asserting she was always in control. so many girls are treated without affection during before, during and after sex and she realises this, and so seeks sex where this does not occur. it's sex and life as it happened for her, and, probably more so for women like me, funny with its wry sense of humour. the problem i have with it is the way it hurts the other people involved, and she insists this was not her intention, as her intention was for the world outside a couple of her friends never to see it. stupid in hindsight!
she notes the best sex she had was with the man who cared about her pleasure as well as his. interesting and controversial no doubt! and yes, she did learn from her actions- she was remorseful for her carelessness in sending it out.